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Too Stressed and Overwhelmed

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It was an honor to speak at a Marine Corps Ball on a Saturday night, but was it too much for someone who lives with mental illness and needs balance and boundaries?

Marine Corps 1990

 

Listen – it meant a lot to me that I was invited, and I want to do whatever I can to honor my Marine Corps. It’s been 25 years since I was honorably discharged.

Here’s the deal: I arrived home from travels close to midnight on Friday night. I had to leave my house at noon Saturday to drive the four hours to Rock Hill, SC to speak for 20 minutes and then drive home. I got back home after midnight. On Sunday, I didn’t do anything but rest – watching football and lounging on the couch all day. After the week I had, it was easy to give myself permission to do this. I was in eastern Texas at the beginning of the week and closed it out with a speaking engagement in western Washington – followed by an all-day flight home Friday.

I spoke for free at the Marine Corps Ball and didn’t expect to get paid. Let’s call that giving back. But it gets complicated when I start thinking about travel time, being busy and overwhelmed, free talks versus self-care. I speak for a living, after all.

If I think about my clients, I realize that it wasn’t fair to them to push myself and speak at the ball. I wasn’t being fair to myself either. At the end of the day, my self-care should have been more important. I need balance and boundaries in order to prioritize my life and my speaking schedule.

Today I was in the office early, knowing I had a lot of work to catch up on before I fly out to Philadelphia this evening. Mostly, I was working with my media team and taking care of the website.

The website has been a thorn in my side for the past few months. It’s outdated and needs to have all the widgets updated – but before I could do that, I needed to update the PHP. Your guess is as good as mine about what that means. It’s language that computer code geeks know. It’s code that confuses me and I don’t have the patience for it.

The website crashed when I tried to update a plug-in.  That’s more than an hour I will never get back, and that’s another reason I am transferring the hosting of the website to a new platform.

Thankfully for Charles Kirkland, my go-to guy in website marketing, he was able to help us make some sense of what we are doing and what we need to do. He was on speed dial a few times today.

Maybe I wouldn’t have stressed about this so much if I got the rest I needed – but I made the decision to speak, pro bono, at the Marine Corps Ball.

Maybe I’m too busy as a professional speaker to do motivational talks for free. I think I should reevaluate my schedule and take a good look at how many times I speak.

My Hilton Honors has me staying at a Hilton hotel 147 nights this year and it’s only November 11. That’s a lot of travel.

Teen Mental Health Motivational Speaker

It was a very stressful day, but was it really all that stressful considering what many people deal with in their lives?

Living with Mental Illness

I’m a man that lives with major depression, bipolar II disorder and PTSD. Maybe I’m making too much of this. I won’t disagree, but I do that, and it bothers me. A lot.

Why can’t I let it go and just be present and thankful I’m making progress every day? I pride myself on showing up and doing the best I can – but then my expectations are too high.

I’m confused and bothered by this stress.

Change in Medication

Another thing I need to be aware of is my change in medication. I’ve recently switched from Lexapro to Wellbutrin. I don’t know enough to think this could be the cause, but I know enough to be aware that me being on medication is important. It’s good to be reminded of this fact.

Flying off to Philadelphia

So, I’m at the airport and my flight is slightly delayed. That doesn’t bother me, but sometimes it does. I’m getting ready to board and I thought I’d throw some thoughts out on the blog instead of hiding on my social media profiles.

I think I’m going to spend this 90-minute flight to Philadelphia grateful to recognize how I am feeling and letting this go.

I’m going to spend time thankful I got to speak at the Marine Corps Ball. Whether it was a paid talk or a pro bono talk doesn’t matter. I think I need to have more boundaries and balance in my life personally and professionally. I need to focus on the tasks at hand, my time management – and know my schedule months in advance.

Saying no Is a lesson we can all learn. If we don’t say no, it’s too easy to become overwhelmed. When we are overwhelmed not only do we suffer, but those we are closest to suffer as well.

Tomorrow is a New Day

Tomorrow is a new day. Maybe all this could have waited one more day and I could have just been present and enjoyed today – Veterans Day!

Happy Veterans Day to myself and all my fellow veterans. Now I’m bothered I didn’t get to enjoy the day I earned because I was too stressed and overwhelmed.

I’m learning each and every day. This is just another day of living with bipolar. Today, it beat me. Tomorrow, I’m taking back control over my mental illness.

Now this: As I’m getting ready to board, the gate agent just advised us of maintenance, and we are further delayed. There was a bird strike on the plane’s final approach. It could be a lot worse, I guess. Thankfully, I’m not that bird who played chicken with an inbound plane.

Just breathe friends, just breathe.

Who is Jeff Yalden?

Teen Mental Health Motivational and Educational Consultant for School Communities and Mental Health Professionals

Jeff Yalden is highly regarded as one of the top mental health experts in the world primarily focused on education and school communities working with teens, school administration, counselors, teachers, staff, parents and community leaders.

He’s a four-time best-selling author including his latest book, TEEN SUICIDE: The WHY Behind Today’s Suicide Epidemic.

His Podcast: Mental Health and Motivation continues to attract thousands of new subscribers every month for his direct talk and influence on today’s mental health conversations for teens and adults.

You can learn more about Jeff Yalden by visiting his website – www.JeffYalden.com. You can also learn more about Jeff’s Suicide Prevention Online Course for School Communities and Parents, Jeff Yalden University, and follow Jeff on YouTube and Social Media by clicking on the links below:

For more information, please visit www.JeffYalden.com or click on any link below:

Online Suicide Prevention Course for School Communities

Book: Teen Suicide: They WHY Behind America’s Suicide Epidemic  

Facebook Page

School Resources

Join Mailing List: Text YALDEN to 66866

Staff Development: Talking Teens & Mental Health

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When the phone rings or I get an email from a school community requesting me to come and speak to students about teen mental health awareness or suicide prevention, I get excited. For more than two decades, I’ve been speaking in the educational market – talking to teens about leadership, character, self-esteem, mental health and suicide prevention – and having fun living my purpose and passion. I have the greatest job in the world. I am a mental health speaker who specializes in school communities.

Teachers are a growing concern for mental illness

Yes, I also speak at mental health conferences for adults, but I primarily work in school communities in a concerted effort to address the state of our youth and their mental well-being. This is a huge issue. It’s not good and we should be concerned about it. But I have another concern that should be of high priority too.

The mental well-being of school staff is the elephant in the room and needs to be attended to. I am serious about this – and this includes teachers, administrators, counselors and even school psychologists.

How do I know?

I know because I’m boots-on-the-ground whenever I work in these school communities, and I get to know many of these people when I am hired to come in. Many staff members are struggling. Some know that they are. Others might be in denial. But the fact is that they need help.

I stay in touch with former teachers, counselors, administrators, school psychologists and therapists who no longer work in education because of the toll it took on them. By not setting boundaries, some of these wonderful people personalized the pain of others and took it home with them. This is called secondhand trauma. Its effects can be debilitating.

Perhaps you have a staff member who is not admitting that they are overwhelmed, stressed or anxious. Maybe this person is clearly having trouble handling the expectations placed on them. Instead of managing their self-care, setting boundaries or talking about what’s bothering them, they might be avoiding these things altogether. You would be surprised at how many people prefer to avoid these potentially harmful issues. Living in denial is no place to be.

We absolutely need to be taking care of our staff. We need to take care of each other.

Almost every time I come into a school community, I meet people who share their stories with me. Maybe it’s because I am a stranger and it feels safer that way. Sometimes they open up about someone in their family who is struggling. Many times, somebody will follow me to my car when I’m leaving. They might tell me their story or ask how I am able to live so effectively with my mental health issues.

I am diagnosed with PTSD, major depression and bipolar 2 disorder.

I am always glad when somebody who is struggling asks me about how they can take that first step toward getting the help they need.

That first step is simply this:

We have to get comfortable talking and asking for help. It’s OK to not be OK, but it isn’t OK if you don’t do anything about it. If we don’t talk it out, we will act it out. By talking to someone – hopefully a mental health professional – you will feel less anxious and more at ease. Talking will give you the coping skills and tools you need to solve your problems and begin to overcome your struggles.

Below, I have posted a message from a dear friend who once hired me to speak at their school. It was necessary for this person to take time off to take care of self.

This is very common in today’s educators. I see it every day. I have many counselors and school psychologists that have had to leave education because of their exposure to secondhand trauma. I work with quite a few of them personally.

To all my educator friends: You can have empathy and compassion, but you can’t carry the darkness or the burden of our students. Self-care is about you taking care of yourself. It’s not selfish. Don’t ignore the red flags of your well-being. You matter. Our students need you.

A School Administrator and Mental Illness

“Good morning, my Friend.

Just watched this morning’s video and am now crying in a coffee shop. Good tears, though, because you gave a message I needed to hear this morning. I am working on acceptance every single day…super hard for me. We are now med-twins. I have been diagnosed with “moderate recurrent major depression.” Have been working with a wonderful therapist, as you know, but my doctor finally said, “Enough is enough. Two choices…stop resisting and try meds, or I admit you somewhere.” He plays hard ball and I love him for it. I started Wellbutrin about 6 weeks ago, and therapy was upped to twice a week through the worst of it. I am finally beginning to emerge from the fog, though I have a lot more work to do. I now realize that I’ve lived with depression and anxiety forEVER…. undiagnosed, unacknowledged, and suppressed. I think that my job at school as AP just brought it out…working with kids from trauma, dealing with depression, suicide, drug abuse, etc., overloaded my system and enhanced my negative coping methods (denial denial denial, work harder harder harder, feel responsible to fix all the unfixable things) I crumbled. In therapy, I’m digging up allllllll the shit. Good times! And I’m getting better, I *think*. (Some days I’m not sure, but am told that is part of the process.) You are an inspiration to me every single day. I tell myself all the time, “Jeff does it, so can I.” I believe God sent you to me before I knew I needed you. I had no idea at the time…I brought you in for my kids, but now I need you for me. Funny how life works.
Thinking a lot about how to use this experience to help others someday when I’m stronger and ready. Was thinking how cool it would be to join you on the road…talking to teachers and staff while you address the kids. Our educators are hurting and many of them don’t know how deeply their own wounds run. (I am the perfect example of that…thought it was burnout. Little did I know it wasn’t that simple.)
Anyway…really just wanted to say thank you for continuing to uplift and encourage with strength and courage and vulnerability. Love you! Stay well, and continue to treat yourself with kindness, patience, and compassion. (And good luck with the med shift…I have found the Wellbutrin has given me the energy boost I needed to restart self-care. Hope it works well for you.) ”~Private for Protection

 

Mental Health Educational Speaker, Jeff Yalden

We are losing great teachers and staff members at alarming rates and for many reasons – but one major reason is that the teaching profession is now listed as one of the most stressful jobs out there. We can all do something to change the climate and culture of our institutions, and this alone will be a great step in the overall well-being of everyone. Make this a commitment and be consistent in your plans and execution.

Lose your ego. Open your heart. Take down the wall. Don’t worry about being judged. Talk, my friends.

Thank you all for allowing me to be an inspiration and source of hope to you and your students.

Give hope! Be Influential! Take Care of You First. You can’t pour from an empty pitcher.

Teen Mental Health Motivational and Educational Consultant for School Communities and Mental Health Professionals

Jeff Yalden is highly regarded as one of the top mental health experts in the world primarily focused on education and school communities working with teens, school administration, counselors, teachers, staff, parents and community leaders. 

He’s a four-time best-selling author including his latest book, TEEN SUICIDE: The WHY Behind Today’s Suicide Epidemic.  

His Podcast, Mental Health and Motivation: The Unlikely Life Coach continues to attract thousands of new subscribers every month for his direct talk and influence on today’s mental health conversations for teens and adults. 

You can learn more about Jeff Yalden by visiting his website – www.JeffYalden.com. You can also learn more about Jeff’s Suicide Prevention Online Course for School Communities and Parents, Jeff Yalden University, and follow Jeff on YouTube and Social Media by clicking on the links below:

Online Suicide Prevention Course for School Communities

Jeff Yalden YouTube Channel

Facebook Page

School Resources

Join Mailing List: Text YALDEN to 66866

The Peanut Incident: Why It’s Better to Ask than to Assume

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Most of us have heard the old adage, “If you assume, you make an ASS out of YOU and ME.” It’s a staple in journalism school, but more importantly, the wrong assumption can send your mental state into a downward spiral – sometimes resulting in anger or resentment – or both.

Day 14: Attitude of Gratitude: The ability to walk away without getting angry#BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealth #Veteran #MarineCorps #ServiceLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Monday, November 20, 2017

Mental health speaker and Amazon bestselling author Jeff Yalden says that the ability to walk away from a situation without letting it trigger a negative emotion like anger is key to living your BOOM life.

Recently, Jeff was on a plane from Charlotte, North Carolina, to Kansas City.

He had a Gatorade with him, and when the flight attendant asked him if he wanted anything while in-flight, he thanked her and said he was all set.

But then the warm peanuts came around, Jeff wasn’t offered any.

As he mentioned in episode 61 of The BOOM Podcast, he knows this sounds almost like a non-issue, but it didn’t seem like a non-issue at the time.

“When you have bipolar and anxiety, triggers like this really hit you – and by the way I love those warm peanuts you get on the plane,” he said.

Even though the flight attendant also offered everyone in first class warm towel, including Jeff (which he declined), it felt weird that everybody got the warm peanuts but him.

He decided not to say anything because he didn’t want to seem like a ten-year-old who didn’t get his candy – but somewhere in his emotions was the inkling that he might have done something wrong – as if the peanut exclusion was some sort of punishment.

Jeff is a man who lives with mental illness every day, and he was grateful to keep his emotions in check by repeatedly telling himself to let it go, and this was not a big deal.

But for something that isn’t a big deal, this perceived exclusion happens to many of us, especially on social media.

Let’s say you see a post from a friend who is having a great time at an event with other friends, some of whom you know. The first thought might be that you have been excluded for some reason. You weren’t tagged, and you certainly weren’t out with them. Did you do or say something to hurt this person’s feelings?

“There are little things in everyday life that can affect you, and you start wondering if you did something. My friends, sometimes we just need to let it go,” he said.

To the flight attendant’s credit, maybe she took to heart what Jeff said in his first encounter with her – that he was all set. She offered him a chocolate chip cookie when the flight was about to land, but he politely declined.

“Getting off the plane, she was like, ‘have a great day, sir.’”

Let it go.

“Don’t compare one situation to another situation,” he said. “Don’t compare your life to someone else’s life. I think sometimes when we do that, we raise our anxiety and stress us out more than we need to.

If you haven’t heard from someone for a couple of hours, it’s no big deal.

“We are all busy. We are all trying to work hard – but if you think that maybe you have hurt someone’s feelings – ask them.”

More times than not, you will come to know that it’s not about you.

To listen to this episode of The BOOM Podcast, go HERE.

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us.

Attitude of Gratitude: Day 14

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In Episode 60 of The BOOM Podcast, mental health speaker and Amazon bestselling author Jeff Yalden encourages you to bring the BOOM into your life – whether it’s a factor or an effect – but if you can align that BOOM with a purpose, and that purpose makes you happy every day, even better.

Day 13: Attitude of Gratitude: Living a Life of Purpose that is Bigger than Who We Are: Fulfillment!#BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealth #Veteran #MarineCorps #ServiceLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Friday, November 17, 2017

Day 14 of the “Attitude of Gratitude” series is all about purpose and fulfillment.

“If you knew me when I was younger, and you would have ever thought then that I’d be doing what I’m doing now – there’s no stinkin’ way,” he said, but he added that he is proud of the work he does because it’s fulfilling, meaningful and very rewarding.

Jeff said being happy personally is not the same as being happy professionally, but if you are not happy professionally, you will have a tough time feeling fulfilled.

“You have got to determine whether you are happy or not, and one of the ways for happiness to be fulfilling is to do something in life that is bigger than you. Serve this world or your community or your family in a way that, every single day, you feel like you are not stressed because you are living a purpose that is so big.”

Find what you are grateful for, and this can serve as a roadmap to fulfillment.

Jeff shares a couple of examples of this in his life where his purpose is bigger than himself.

“Carolina Forest High School here in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, had a student make that forever decision about a week ago. I sent a message to the school and I offered my prayers and thoughts. I said I was sorry, and if there was anything I could do, please let me know.”

Because he reached out, Jeff was able to do presentation at the school.

“I feel very fulfilled in my heart that I got to do that,” he said.

He also recently spent two days in Killingly, Connecticut, where the local community lost five people in the past year.

“In those two days, I had some very meaningful conversations with the student body, the counselors and social workers and the administration – and I got to talk to some students one-on-one.”

He also participated in a home visit for a person whose roommate overdosed and died that very day.

“We got to go to the house to just let this person know – ‘we care about you and we just want to make sure that you are OK as you go through this process over the next couple of days.’”

He finished up his time in Killingly by watching the local high school continue to go undefeated against a rival team from Hartford that had three Division 1 athletes on the team.

“It was cold, but it was beautiful to watch those kids of character and, resilience and perseverance,” he said.

What can you do that is bigger than you?

“When you find something to do that gives you a beautiful purpose, your life is going to change,” he said.

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us.

Attitude of Gratitude: Day 13

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Years ago, Amazon bestselling author Jeff Yalden was walking toward his gate at Pittsburgh International Airport when he caught sight of Bill Cowher, then the head coach for the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Day 12: Attitude of Gratitude: The Truth will Expose You … How I Called Out The Principal this Morning. Recognizing the Little Things. #BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealth #Veteran #MarineCorps #Service #BillCowher #PittsburghSteelers #LittleThings #Respect Link to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Monday, November 13, 2017

Jeff’s first inclination was to go up and shake Cowher’s hand, but he wavered for a moment because he thought most everybody wanted Cowher’s time and he likely didn’t want to be bothered.

But he decided to approach Cowher anyway. The iconic coach was with his wife, Kaye Cowher, who died in 2010.

“I will never forget that moment,” he said. “Bill Cowher stopped and turned toward me, and his wife engaged in the conversation. They probably gave me 20 seconds, and 20 seconds is a long time. I introduced myself and told him I was a big fan. He looked me in the eye. His wife smiled, but I remember him smiling and saying, ‘thank you.’”

Day 13 of the “Attitude of Gratitude” series is all about exposing the truth, and how the little things will hold you accountable.

Jeff recorded this episode of The BOOM Podcast in Reno, where he was the keynote speaker for one of the regional Student Council (STUCO) conferences in Nevada.

He arrived early at the hosting high school, got set up for the event, and met the principal.

“I went to shake his hand,” he said. “It was a good handshake, but he gave me that ‘looking away’ handshake.”

This moment turned into a later defining conversation between Jeff and the principal.

“I asked the principal if there was anything he wanted me to share in my message, and he was telling me about social media and first impressions.”

Obviously, the door was wide-open for Jeff to bring up his earlier first-impression – that handshake.

“I took a great risk, but I tried to be tactful,” he said. “I explained the handshake we had, and I explained to him exactly what he did. He didn’t realize he had done that.”

The point is this:

‘I know you’re busy. I’m busy too. I know we’re grinding so hard every single day and that sometimes we need stop and be present.”

Jeff recalled a similar moment when a young man bought one of his books after a school presentation a while back.

“Apparently, I didn’t acknowledge him – and I remember getting an email from him, just blasting me. I reached out to the school and to the advisor of this young student. I tried to do everything I could. I sent books, t-shirts, posters, pictures. That young man wanted nothing to do with me because of that one moment.”

According to Jeff, sometimes that first impression is a lasting impression.

Always remember that a little kindness and common courtesy go a long way.

“My moment of gratitude today is recognizing that it’s the little things every single day.”

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us.

 

Attitude of Gratitude: Day 12

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If you can count your true friends on one hand, consider yourself wealthy.

In Episode 58 of The BOOM Podcast, mental health speaker and Amazon bestselling author Jeff Yalden continues to lay out his 28-Day “Attitude of Gratitude” series.

Day 12 is all about self-awareness.

Day 11: Attitude of Gratitude: Being Self Aware – Knowing You’re Loved or Hated#BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealth #Veteran #MarineCorps #ServiceLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Sunday, November 12, 2017

Are you loved? Hated? A little of both? Self-aware people know where they stand with others.

Jeff has a close circle of friends that he knows he can call if he ever needs them – and any of these friends would be there for him in a heartbeat.

“I consider myself a very wealthy person, but I think it’s also important to understand and to be OK with the fact that not everybody will like you,” he said.

An interesting question to ponder is this: Do we change who we are to meet their approval, or do we continue being who we are in our lives’ journeys?

Your journey is not somebody else’s journey.

“Listen: There are a lot of people that don’t like me, and there are a lot of people that don’t like you – but here’s the thing: Are we going to live our lives every single day, giving these people the power over our emotions, or are we going to realize that there are people that just don’t like us?

People might not like you because you are different from them.

Being different is OK.

“But if people don’t like you because you are a straight-up ass, I think you really need to look at the type of person you are, because there might be a lot of other people with valid reasons for not liking you – and if that’s the case, I don’t see that you live a very happy life.”

Jeff knows that he can be loud, opinionated and selfish with his time, but in his self-awareness, he knows his intentions are pure.

“I’ve got a big heart. Maybe too big – so I can’t really be affected by people that don’t like me. You might not like me because I’ve made mistakes in the past. I have. I’ve hurt people in the past, and I’m sorry,” he said. “Have you ever said something to someone you wish you didn’t say? Have you ever done something you wish you didn’t do?”

We all have, haven’t we?

“I can’t dwell on the past. I can kind of look at the past as a rear-view mirror. It’s just used to check out the past, but you don’t live there long,” he said.

But if you have hurt somebody, Jeff recommends reaching out to them and apologizing if you can.

“Now it’s up to them to accept your apology and maybe give you forgiveness – which I think most people probably would – but there are also a lot of people who might not.”

But at this point, it’s no longer about you. The ball is in their court now. You have attempted to make amends, and if forgiveness doesn’t come, that’s their issue. There is nothing more for you to do.

“In being self-aware, I think it’s important to know who you are – but it’s just as important to know who you are not. In being aware of who you are not, you are also choosing to live in a way that you are not going to live your life to meet the approval of other people,” he said.

Jeff said that if you can forgive, and if you can apologize and ask for forgiveness from the people you may have hurt, that’s a very powerful place to be.

“When you look in the mirror, the big question is this: Are you as beautiful a person on the inside as you are on the outside? That’s the question that you must answer.”

When Jeff recorded this podcast episode, he was getting ready to head to Reno, Nevada for a speaking gig.

“I’m going to reflect on the plane – about who I am as a man – who I am as a significant other – who I am as a leader in my community and a leader in my field of work – and I want to challenge you to do the same thing.

The question is: Do you like yourself? Because that’s what matters the most.”

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us.

Attitude of Gratitude: Day 11

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When mental health speaker and Amazon Bestselling author Jeff Yalden recorded Episode 57 of The BOOM Podcast, he found himself at home in the beautiful Myrtle Beach area – enjoying some quality time and chilling on his patio and planning his day.

Then it hit him: This was November 10, also known as the Marine Corps Birthday, which is now 242 years old.

Day 11: Attitude of Gratitude: Being a Veteran and Service to a Purpose Greater than Myself#BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealth #Veteran #MarineCorps #ServiceLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Friday, November 10, 2017

As many of you know, Jeff served as a United States Marine during the Gulf War.

What an awesome time to be recording a podcast episode about gratitude!

“Oorah! Semper Fi to all of my fellow marines that I served with,” he said, adding that this shout-out went to those who served before, who are serving now or thinking about serving in the future – and he extended his thanks to all servicemembers.

“You are serving our country, and you are giving us the very freedom that so many of us take for granted every single day. Thank you.”

And while he was on the subject of gratitude for those who serve – Jeff broadened his scope to include other folks who are of service to a purpose greater than self – who toil selflessly every day to make sure that others are taken care of.

SERVE A PURPOSE GREATER THAN SELF

“Here’s my question: What are you doing in life that makes your community a little bit better? What do you do? What is your service to a purpose that is bigger than you? Think about that.”

Every day, Jeff asks himself the following three questions:Is my life meaningful?

  • Is my life meaningful?
  • Is my life fulfilling?
  • Is my life rewarding?

“I challenge you to ask yourself those three questions – and if you can’t say yes to those three questions, I challenge you to make a change. The greatest change that you can make is finding a purpose in life that is bigger than you.”

For Jeff, as it should be for you, gratitude is feeling good in your heart for something that you are receiving, but it can also be something that you are giving through service to others.

What are you grateful for?

“Sometimes we live our lives so fast that we forget just the little things. Remember this: Fast is slow and slow is fast. Just stop, take it all in – breathe, feel and appreciate – because health is not health unless we first have our mental health.”

Jeff says it’s imperative that we lower the anxiety we experience every day, and get to the heart of what is bothering us and taking up space in our heads.

“If you go out every single day and you are living at about a seven out of ten on the anxiety scale – how productive are you, really?”

Instead, start your day with a self-care routine – reflecting on the things you appreciate. Don’t be like 99 percent of the people who are on autopilot – merely going through the motions. That’s not living.

“Wake up every day with a purpose, my friends. Wake up every single day with love in your heart. Wake up every day knowing that life is a challenge – but as much as life is a challenge, life is also a blessing.”

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us.

Attitude of Gratitude: Day 10

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As you may have noticed, mental health speaker and Amazon bestselling author Jeff Yalden sometimes records episodes for The BOOM Podcast on the fly. His travel and speaking schedule is usually jam-packed, and he takes advantage of every opportunity to make sure he gets his message out, whenever and wherever he can.

Day 10: Attitude of Gratitude: Believe & Ask Questions = Good Things Happen#BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealthLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Episode 56 was no different. Jeff was sitting in a warm rental car and watching the snow come down in Fargo, North Dakota – the first snow he encountered this year.

Believe and Ask Questions: Good Things Happen

Earlier that day, Jeff said he was 15 miles from Sky Harbor International Airport in Phoenix, where he was scheduled to take a morning flight to Minneapolis. He thought he’d get to the airport early and get a bit of work done before his flight.

That 15 miles took him an hour-and-a-half, and when he got there, things were at a standstill because a bomb threat had been called into Sky Harbor. There were no flights coming in or going out. Rental cars and buses were being stopped and checked.

The first class and priority boarding line was 100 people deep.  At that point, his flight was supposed to have been boarding in 20 minutes. He mentioned this to one of the airline employees, but was told to get back in line.

You might be wondering what this has to do with an Attitude of Gratitude.

“I spend a lot of money traveling all over the world, doing the work that I do, and I’m t hinking that I have got to get to my flight, because Concordia College had a suicide about a month ago. I had to speak to these young people tonight and do my thing.”

But he was surely going to miss his flight.

“I kept believing and asking questions, and some of the American Airlines agents said they were sorry, but there was nothing they could do.”

But Jeff kept asking, and he finally asked the right person – a lady who took charge, walked him through TSA and right up to the gate – where they checked his bag.

He was the first one on the plane to Minneapolis.

Another kicker is the fact that he thought he was speaking at Concordia University in St. Paul, Minnesota but found out when he landed in Minneapolis that he was in fact specking at Concordia College in the twin cities of Moorhead, Minnesota and Fargo, North Dakota.

He made it.

Jeff realizes that it might seem a bit narcissistic; flying first class and enjoying the privileges of frequent air travel – and with everything going in the world, he should be grateful to simply be alive.

“I get it,” he said. “I pray every day for the people – whether it be the victims of the Las Vegas massacre, or the [recent church massacre] in Sutherland Springs, Texas. I understand. For millions of people, life goes on – and for many people, life stands still, and I am sorry.”

As he was getting ready to speak in Fargo, he got a text from a friend that a young man in the Carolina Forest area of Myrtle Beach made that forever decision and hung himself that very day.

“My friends, we live in a very uncertain time. If we let all of this affect us every single day, it’s going to take its toll emotionally – and for many of us, it does,” he said.

But one thing that Jeff said keeps us going is this: We simply wake up, brush our teeth, wash our face, do our dance and walk out the door, putting one foot in front of the other.

We keep stepping.

Despite the tragedy and the negativity in our world, Jeff talks about three important points to foster a sense of gratitude and help us on our way:

  • Value yourself. Value your close circle, the people in it – your family and your friends.
  • Ask questions. Do the work. But also, be grateful for the little things that we have every single day. Shelter. Food on the table. Clean clothing. Unconditional love.
  • Your daily choices: Choose a positive attitude and positive behavior, you get positive results. If you choose a negative attitude, you then have negative behavior and then you have negative results.

“My friends, believe every single day. Believe in the beauty of you. Believe in the beauty of your dreams. Believe in the beauty of your influence on people.

Don’t let life beat you up.”

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us.

Attitude of Gratitude: Day Nine

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When mental health speaker and Amazon bestselling author Jeff Yalden recorded Day Nine of his “Attitude of Gratitude” series for The BOOM Podcast, he was in Phoenix, Arizona, for what was to be a grueling series of talks – and his voice was showing signs of strain.

Day 9: Attitude of Gratitude: Better Health = Better Performance#BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealthLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Tuesday, November 7, 2017

 

BETTER HEALTH, BETTER PERFORMANCE

Jeff’s program agreement for the two schools in Phoenix listed two school assemblies, but when he arrived, he was astounded to discover that he was to do two assemblies at each school.

“What? I’m speaking four times in one day? No, man – I don’t do that,” he said.

But he has worked for 25 years with teenagers, parents and mental health professionals – and he wasn’t about to let a situation like this get to him.

“What was I going to do – argue the program agreement when I am already out here in Phoenix? The bottom line is that I just had to go with it – and you know what? I went with it,” he said.

Last year, Jeff wouldn’t have been able to do this – but since he had taken major steps to get control of his health and physical well-being, including weight-loss surgery, a healthy diet and regular exercise, he was able to push through the four assemblies with no trouble.

“I’m feeling good, but I’ll tell you, one thing that is hurting [is] my voice. But sometimes you’ve just got to suck it up and do what you’ve got to do – and remember: Lose your ego, open your heart and do the little things that other people aren’t willing to do.”

Do these three things to help improve your health and your performance:

  • Get your sleep.
  • Get Proper Nutrition
  • Get Involved.

Today was an awesome day, although my voice is hurting.”

Better health, better performance.

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us!

Attitude of Gratitude: Day Eight

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Day Eight of the 28-Day “Attitude of Gratitude” series is all about self-care – and Amazon bestselling author and mental health speaker Jeff Yalden explains this very important topic in Episode 54 of The BOOM Podcast.

Day 8: Attitude of Gratitude: Recognizing the Importance of Self-Care. #BOOM28 #BOOM #JeffYalden #Gratitude #MentalHealth #Attitude #Gratitude #LifeofSuccess #Depression #Appreciation #People #Success #LiveLifetotheFullest #CarpeDiem #NAMI #MentalHealthSpeaker #NationalAssociationMentalHealthLink to iTunes Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/boom-one-word-to-inspire-action-and-deliver-rewards/id1238558637

Posted by Jeff Yalden on Monday, November 6, 2017

 

Jeff recorded this episode while he was getting ready to fly to Phoenix, Arizona – but he was able to get in a game of golf before he left town.

The Importance of Self-Care

“Whether you have children, a high-stress job with great expectations and a lot of responsibility, or it’s your family – hey, I get it I know,” he said. But through all the stress and the anxiety with everything that’s going on, [the] one thing that you cannot go without is taking care of yourself.”

Jeff offered the following components of self-care that he feels are critical:

  • Make sure you are eating well. One of the things that contributes to depression is sugar – and even just feeling bloated can trigger an emotional, negative response. Get proper nutrition.
  • Make sure you exercise daily – getting the endorphins up and the blood flowing.

Jeff says that he has not been exercising lately as much as he would like to, but he has been playing golf like crazy.

“That’s something right now that I am enjoying,” he said, adding that he likes the competitiveness of the sport and the opportunity to enjoy the beautiful weather that the Myrtle Beach area has to offer.

Exercise is not too far off his radar, but for now, golf is doing what he needs it to do during such a busy work schedule.

“Even if it’s 40 or 50 degrees where you are and the sun is out, get outside and get a walk in – just a nice, brisk walk. And breathe,” he said.

Try waking up 15 minutes earlier to practice some positive affirmations: “I am strong. I am capable. I deserve great things in life.”

Positive behavior + positive attitude = positive outcome.

Negative behavior + negative attitude = negative outcome.

Jeff warns us not to allow a negative outcome to make us victims.

“My friends: You are not a victim. You are a victor,” he said. “Stop being bitter and angry about life or life’s circumstances and choose to become better every single day. That is what we do.”

Remember: Self-care is not selfish. Make time in your day to take care of yourself, whether it’s eating lunch in your car and listening to music or self-help programs.

“Meditate. Breathe. Lower your anxiety. Get involved in yoga or pick up the golf clubs and go swing those sticks,” he said.

Jeff is putting together a golfing event in Myrtle Beach in April. For more information, go HERE.

Find out why Jeff Yalden is North America’s Number One Youth Motivational Speaker. Go HERE.

Check out Jeff’s new nonprofit, THE JEFF YALDEN FOUNDATION.

Jeff’s speaking calendar fills up fast. To book him now for your event, organization or school now, call 800-948-9289.

For a limited time, you can own Jeff’s new book, Your Life Matters, for only $0.99 on KINDLE.

SUBSCRIBE to The BOOM Podcast.

JOIN the BOOM Nation Facebook Group and share your BOOM moments with us!

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