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Why Teens Need a Mental Health Life Coach

April 15, 2020 by Jeff Yalden

Teen Life Coach Jeff Yalden

Jeff Yalden speaks to teens one on one everywhere he goes.

Your teen needs a Teen Life Coach and a Mental Health Life Coach for support and encouragement. Consider Jeff Yalden. He’s been that trusted teen life coach for many years.
Growing up teen today is harder than it has ever been.
Parenting is harder than it’s ever been too, and that is why teens need a Mental Health Life Coach. Parents can use a coach that understands teens as well.

As a Youth Motivational Speaker & Coach, Jeff Hears Their Cries

Pressures of being a teen today are overwhelming. The mental well-being of our teens is seriously being compromised.
Jeff sees it everyday in his talks with teens and school communities. High School Assemblies with youth motivational speaker Jeff Yalden are 15 hours and in that time he meets one on one with many teens requesting to speak to him personally.
After his high school assemblies students line up to talk about life, their family struggles, abuse, brokenness, loss, fear, anxiety, stress, feelings of being overwhelmed and more.
A personal conversation with Jeff and teens feel they can trust in him to share their heart.
Visit Jeff’s Website

Why Teens want to speak to Jeff Yalden

For so many reasons, teens are afraid to talk, including but not limited to:
  • They’re afraid you’re going to try and fix it
  • They’re afraid you’re going to judge them
  • You’re going to tell them they’re overreacting
  • You don’t understand the pressure of being a teen
  • You’re not going to take them seriously
  • They’re afraid of being a burden
  • They can’t figure out how they’re feeling themselves
  • They feel you won’t value their feelings, thoughts, and emotions
So what do teens do? They isolate themselves trying to figure it all out and it becomes too overwhelming.

Teens don’t trust adults

Sounds crazy, but it’s true and that is why they’re not reaching out to their trusted adults. Ask many teens who their trusted adult is and they’ll tell you they don’t have one. Scared, isolated, and teens feel alone and a disappointment. They’re not speaking because they are afraid to burden their closest adults with their problems. They know how stressful life is for you that they don’t want to overwhelm you with their problems.
“I wanted to say “Thank You” for letting me thing that I do belong here and I am special. I am loved and that I don’t need to end it all to get what I want.I will never forget everything you said to everyone.” – Student, OH

Two Questions Teens Need Answered

VbSzbvllRIy7GyUtwkeYhgIf you’re going to connect and be able to get the trust and respect from your teens you have to answer these two questions:
  • Can I trust you?
  • Do you care about me?
You can’t just say, “I’m the parent. Of course they know they can trust me.” Not so fast. How do you show it? How do they know?
Teens don’t walk in the house from school and say, “Mom and dad, I’ve had a bad day. Can we talk?“
They go to their room just wishing you would come through the door and listen to their heart without saying a word. Just listen.
In isolation their minds are left thinking the worst.
You spell LOVE: T-I-M-E. TIME and being non-judgmental when you’re listening.

Teen Pressures are Overwhelming

With all the pressures: social media, school, friends, their future, and the expectations, teens are overwhelmed. Their mental health is being compromised and teens don’t know how to cope.
Teen Life Coach Jeff Yalden

Mental Health Teen Life Coach Jeff Yalden reaches students.

Major concerns such as self-harm, depression, and maybe even suicidal ideation if teens don’t ask for help or parents don’t advocate for their child.
A teen mental health life coach helps your teen navigate the process of life by listening and offering practical tips and advice. Having this teen life coach will lead to self-value, self-respect, and a confidant they can talk to without judgement.
It’s extremely important to have a mental health life coach to help deal with everyday challenges for teens.
Someone that understands them and can help them navigate the process of life in a calm, non-reactionary, balanced journey; giving them practical tips and advice.

Teen Suicide: Is your Teen Next?

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After a suicide, Jeff meets with students and friends and gives them permission to talk and feel while leading them in on a healthy and positive path to closure and acceptance.

Jeff Yalden is an expert on teen mental health and teen suicide.
Teen Suicide has been and continues to be an epidemic in school communities everywhere.
You may have heard about the show “13 Reasons Why” that tells the story of how a teen girl takes her own life after experiencing many traumatic experiences.
Many mixed views about the show.  Some feel like the show provides a valuable opportunity for discussion about bullying and teen suicide.
On the other side of the spectrum are those that feel the show glorifies suicide and shows that it is an easy option.
Regardless of what you think, Jeff says the show is popular because it is a conversation teens are having.  Suicide is a thought and that is why teens are paying attention.  For this reason, Jeff says as a parent you should be watching the show because your teen is probably watching it themselves.
The show triggers with teens and their emotions.  Pay attention and do something.

Two Reasons Teens Want to End Their Lives

There are two specific reasons teens start thinking about wanting to end their lives.
  1. They feel alone
  2. They feel they’re a disappointment
What comes next if they’re not asking for help is self-harm. Heed the warning signs and take all signs seriously.

Teens are in a Vulnerable and Emotional State

Teen Mental Health Life Coach Jeff YaldenThe years of being a teen are very stressful and although as parents you’ve been through it, it just isn’t the same.
This is one of the reasons why teens need a mental health life coach they can talk to weekly or bi-monthly.
A teen life coach that can teach them skills that will help them deal with everyday life stressors. A teen life coach that gives them tools o they can add to their toolbox.
As a teen life coach, Jeff spends a lot of time teaching coping skills and problem solving skills.

Teens in Therapy

Jeff feels strongly that professional counseling is a great place for teens.
Teens don’t trust in adults, especially counselors and don’t feel they need therapy. A teen life coach having been through the journey of mental health counseling can really help your teen with understanding what counseling is.
You can’t just say to a teen, “You need therapy.“
Therapy is a process and Jeff works with his clients to help them understand the benefits of therapy and perhaps medication, if that is needed.
Teens trust in Jeff because he stays on their side and explains how it all works. Jeff validates their feelings and thoughts but shows the benefits of giving professional counseling a try and sticking to it.
In the process of working with a teen life coach make sure that this teen life coach knows enough about mental health in teens.  Also, this teen life coach understands their boundaries between a teen life coach and professional therapist.
The two can easily work together. Jeff specializes in working with the client and another therapist. Jeff says, “We both have our strengths and I don’t interfere with the therapist at all.” Working together it’s a win-win situation.

13 Reasons why a Teen Mental Health Life Coach is Right for Your Teen

1. Social Media and Teens:

The overwhelming amount of time being on Social Media. More time on social media is more time isolating yourself from the world. Isolation is toxic.
18If your teen is spending 4-5 or more hours on social media platforms they’re 70% more likely to have major depression in their life.
Jeff Yalden can assist you as a parent with explaining what social media and the dopamine effect are doing to teens.

2.Mandated Testing in Schools:

The anxiety and pressure teens are facing with tests is overwhelming and causing a lot of stress.  Teens think today that if they’re not perfect what is the point.
The expectations teens feel they’re not reaching are coming from school, parents, themselves, and keeping up with their friends.
Your teen needs help managing the anxiety that comes with this overwhelming pressure. A teen life coach teaches helpful tools to manage this anxiety in order to be more successful in school and in life.
Here is a FREE Introduction Course on Meditation from Jeff.

3. Bullying and Cyberbullying

Youth Motivational Speaker Jeff YaldenTeen suicide is rarely the cause of one thing such as bullying. Bullying can be the straw that breaks the camels back, but today, Jeff will tell you that bullying or cyberbullying can certainly be the cause of a teen suicide completion or attempt.
Absolutely!
Kids are mean and this occurs in school, on social media, and a lot of the time at home.
It’s very rare for a teen to never experience being bullied by the time they have graduated from high school.
Having a teen life coach can teach skills to help your teen handle the bullying and even prevent bullying from happening to them.  Teens also need these skills to help them realize when they are being the bully and how not to get in that situation.
While most schools have anti-bullying programs in place the students don’t take them seriously and sometimes these programs give new opportunities for bullying to occur.

4. Divorce and Family Issues

Family issues and blended families is more normal amongst teens and their friends. Too many of our teens have these feelings they are the cause of the tension in the family or the reason for the divorce.
Family issues are very emotional for the teen. Maybe more so than for the parents.
Having a teen life coach can help your teen find emotional resilience and manage the big picture, the change, and how to take this one day at a time without getting caught up in the brokenness.
If your child doesn’t talk to someone and express their thoughts and feelings the pain will manifest into behavior that leads to further problems, anxiety, depression, and maybe suicidal ideation.

5.  Peer Pressure

Imagine the pressure you feel as an adult trying to keep up with family, friends, and co-workers.
Teens need to learn how to follow their own personal course and to enjoy getting to know who they are and not trying to live in other people shoes.
Having a teen life coach can help your teen make decisions for themselves where they take pride in who they are and the course of their own life.

6. Sexual abuse

Being abused sexually is more common than you’d imagine.  According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC), teens account for 51% of all reported sexual abuse and female victims of teen sexual abuse while in grades 9-12 are more likely than others to experience eating disorders, suicidal ideation, pregnancy, and risky sexual behaviors.
A teen life coach will give your teen the consistent coaching that can help your teen know the difference between being where they should be and where they should not be, but more importantly having the confidence to say, “NO.”
Your teen needs to understand how and where sexual abuse occurs and if it’s happened a teen life coach can help them process and be comfortable talking to their parents and professional help as it’s the right thing to do.

7.  Alcohol and Drugs: Self-Medicating

Too many of our teens are vaping, drinking, and experiencing with pills. It’s become a Teen Life Coach says every teen needs a trust adult in their life.norm for too many teens today and they’re not taking it seriously.
George Mason University says this culture of alcohol drinking can lead to higher rates of teen sex, teen pregnancy, date rape, violence, and illegal activity.
Teens believe it is not a big deal to drink alcohol, because everyone does it, even their parents.
Alcohol becomes a go-to for stress and anxiety.  Self-medicating.
A teen life coach can help with coping skills and problem solving skills on how to deal with anxiety, stress, and everyday problems.

8. The Maturity of a Teen’s Brain

The prefrontal cortex is the part of the brain where emotional control, impulse restraint and rational decision-making take place.  According to Dr. David Walsh, this part of the brain does not fully mature until around the age of 25 and this is why many teenagers do not practice “good judgment” in difficult situations.

9.  Teens Don’t Like Talking to Adults

Again, Jeff says you have to earn their respect and trust and it takes time.
Teen Life Coach, Jeff Yalden saves a teen and visits her a year later.

One of the most memorable moments of Jeff’s career as a teen life coach was this young lady and the two years of saving her life.

Teens withdraw from parents and spend more time alone or with their friends. Isolation is toxic and our teens are spending too much time alone or with their friends asking the questions they should be asking an adult.
Having a teen life coach in your teens life can help them make good decisions and guide them through the tough times they don’t feel comfortable talking to their parents or counselors about.

10. Drama . . . Drama . . . Drama

Drama causes a lot of ups and downs and happens daily in a teens life.
One day your teen is best friends with someone and the next day she is not.
Hateful are said to each other and rumors can be spread.  This can lead to bullying and depression.
Your teen needs to have a mentor to show them the bigger picture.  When it comes to friends a teen life coach can help your teen use their inner judgement in making good decisions when it comes to the friends that matter and to the friends that are acquaintances.

11. The Future Decisions

Life Coach for TeensThe future is a huge stress factor for high school students in junior and senior year of high school.
If your teen is in a competitive high school environment it’s even worse.  If your teen doesn’t get into a good school they’ll feel a disappointment to themselves and their parents.
Teens feel the pressure to know what they want to do as a career as early a 9th grade.
They get confused from all of the pressure from parents, friends, teachers, and media.
A teen life coach can help teen your teen make these decisions by asking questions that make the most sense to them and what they want in their life.

12. The feelings of being Alone and a Disappointment

Most teens feel alone and a disappointment.  Teens are becoming more independent and trying to figure out what their purpose in life is, who their friends are, and what they are good at.
As they are learning more about themselves they may have moments of feeling left out or like they are different than everyone else.
Teen Life Coaches can help a teens understand that we are all connected and here for different reasons.  Teens are wondering what their purpose is and a teen life coach can help guide them in the right direction while supporting and encouraging them in their journey.

13.  They’re Influences such as Television and the Internet

Teens are influenced everyday and everything is influential to a teen who is easily impressionable.
Suicide contagion is real.  Television shows like “13 Reasons Why” was very impressionable on millions of teens.
Teens need a life coach to know that suicide is a permanent action to a situation that is temporary.
By you giving your teen a life coach, someone to talk to and trust in on a consistent basis you are giving your teen a trusted mentor to teach important life-saving tools that will help your teen gain a healthy mind in order to live a happy and successful life with meaning and purpose.
Consider a teen life coach for your teen today, by visiting Jeff Yalden: Teen Life Coach and Teen Mental Health Expert.

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, For Parents, High Schools, Life, Mental Health, Motivation, Personal Development, Purpose, Self-Care, Success, Teen Depression / Suicide, Youth Programs Tagged With: Counseling, Education, High School Motivational Speaker, Inspirational, Jeff Yalden, Mental Health Coach, Motivational, preventing teen suicide, Schools, Speakers on Depression, Teen Communicator, teen depression, Teen Life Coach, Teen Mental Health, Teen Speaker, Teen Suicide, Teen Suicide Experts, teenage depression, Teens, Youth, Youth Speaker

Inspiring Conversations: Ep.1 – Bobby Petrocelli

April 1, 2020 by Jeff Yalden

You Matter . . . IT Doesn’t

I got on ZOOM about five minutes before our time of 12:00pm, April 1, 2020. No, this is not an April Fools’ Day joke. By the way, I don’t like April Fools’ jokes. I was excited to speak with fellow author, speaker and educator Bobby Petrocelli. I asked him to tell me a couple of things on his heart that he might want to talk about that day.

Bobby Petrocelli is passionate and wise, and I knew I’d have questions.

Right away, Bobby mentioned his book, YOU MATTER . . . IT DOESN’T. He told me he wanted to talk about the WHY behind the IT. I knew where he was going with this because it’s right up my alley. I composed myself and started with a prayer…

A Talk Show is BORN!

During my interview with Petrocelli, it dawned on me that I needed to do a YouTube channel dedicated to inspiring conversations, and here we are. Just like that, the show is created. Now I just need to figure out how to make a YouTube talk show.

This is a good time to figure it out, because nothing much is happening, and I have time. The COVID-19 pandemic has us all struggling with social isolation. Schools are closed, many people are out of work and obviously my speaking schedule is on hold.

It’s during times like this where you have time to create new ideas that might take off. We can choose victim or victor, right? I love Bobby Petrocelli. He’s a great man and an amazing speaker. We’ve known each other for many years.  When I get a chance to interview him, I get excited. He’s inspiring and knowledgeable. He’s a man of God and cares about youth and families. He cares about people.

Find out more about Bobby HERE.

IT HAPPENED . . .

What is IT?

The IT represents the result of something. Bobby talked about his wife being killed by a drunk driver when he was 24 years old. The IT is his wife was killed by a drunk driver. The WHY is what we don’t often talk about. Among other things, the IT leaves us angry, hurt, resentful, and broken. We end up going through life carrying this feeling because we don’t move past IT.

WHY did IT Happen?

The WHY is behind the IT and gives us the answers we are looking for so we can move forward and cope with whatever happened. The WHY takes us on a journey to understand what needs to be understood. If we don’t ask questions, we are never healed through whatever pain we are going through. IT happened and we can’t change it, but we can change how we grow, cope, and move forward in a healthy way. For Bobby, he was prepared as much as anyone can prepare for something tragic like this. He said, “If we don’t ask the WHY then IT will dominate your life,” and he wasn’t going to let that happen. Bobby is a man of faith – a strong man of God. Right away he right away talked about forgiveness…

He didn’t say that he condones wrongdoing.

Forgiveness is for the person doing the forgiving. He knew that he had to forgive this man who was two times the legal limit, driving while intoxicated when his wife was killed. Forgiveness was his first step in recovery. Amazing! He was 24 years old and he knew he had to forgive, when most people would have been angry at the world.

Bobby wasn’t.

I asked him about this.

“I had been prepared for something like this,” he said.  I’m not exactly sure what Bobby meant, because who can prepare for something so tragic – but I knew it was his faith in God. It was also his ability to have a growth mindset instead of a fixed mindset – even at 24. I’m telling you; Bobby Petrocelli is an inspirational man.

Is What You’re Being Asked to do IMPOSSIBLE?

The above question is something Bobby asks his audiences.

“You have it, whatever it is, so let’s build on it,” he said.

Bobby talked about how we have what it takes so let’s learn. Let’s be open to learning and engage in the process every day. I was thinking, don’t be the victim, be the victor. We have a lot in common, but he’s so much better at speaking about it.

You’re never asked to do anything impossible. You can choose to walk away, or you can choose to saddle up and figure it out.

Petrocelli: 10 Seconds

IT happened, but Bobby was not going to fold.

10 Seconds got him through this.

“It’s not one day at a time, like so many people say. For me, I couldn’t think of the next five minutes. I had to break it down to 10 Seconds. For me it was 10 Seconds at a time.”

I was at my worst at 16 and again at 22. I can still remember those days.

At 16, I wasn’t listening to anyone. I had a fixed mindset. At 22, I knew a little better and was very close to my grandparents. My grandmother used to say to me, “Jeff, take it one meal at a time. After dinner, go to bed, and just wake up for breakfast.”

That was my 10 Seconds at a time. The thing here that I want to make clear is that it’s not that things get better with time, but it’s what you do with that time where things get better. Sometimes, it’s just putting space between a thought and an action. It’s being grounded, present in the moment, breathing and just knowing that it will be okay.

Success: Patterns, Habits, and Routines

Nobody is better than anyone else, but some people have a routine and they’re driven. They wake up on time because they go to bed at a set time. They don’t waste hours on their smartphones, doing things that don’t matter. Successful people have a purpose. Their IT is their success. They’ve created patterns, habits and a routine to accomplish the goals they’ve set for themselves.

What is the WHY? That differs from person to person, but one thing is certain: Everyone has been knocked down in life. You have a choice at this point. You can stay knocked down or you can get back up.

Bobby got back up. He knew he needed some things in his life to be right in order for him to cope through his loss.

You are a result of your patterns, habits and routines – your attitude, friends, and commitment to a GROWTH MINDSET.

Your Friends are The ROOTS, LEAVES, or the BRANCHES

I got chills when Bobby started talking about Tyler Perry’s Madea – Let Them Go.

I love this skit and it is so right. Your friends are either the roots, the leaves, or the branches. Watch the video and understand this analogy. So true.

What Works For You

The first thing to do is to engage in the process. Choose a growth mindset. Don’t be a victim. Go from IT happened to understanding WHY it happened. Then, it’s HOW CAN I . . .? How can I be better at this or that? What can I do to be can I be a better person? How can I move forward with love, compassion, forgiveness, and be healthier? It’s about being present in moments. Now. Not yesterday or tomorrow. Not even in five minutes, but here and now.  Within these moments, what productive thing are you doing that works best for you?

Bobby puts it this way: “Is what I am doing making me better or hurting me?”

For Petrocelli, that question made all the difference, and helped him toward a healthy outcome. it was the moments where he would ask if what he was doing was helping or hurting him towards a healthy outcome. He set a growth mindset.

Here are the very simple and true bullets I took from this part of my conversation with Petrocelli:

  • Be still
  • You’re One of a Kind
  • Don’t Rob Yourself
  • Find Those Roots on a Tree as a Friends

Very simple and true.

Be Still

Be present and know that in stillness great things will happen.

You’re One of a Kind

Self-Esteem. Stop focusing on being beautiful on the outside and look within yourself and know you are one of a kind. There is nothing or nobody else like you.

Don’t Rob Yourself

You have a gift and you need to use it. Don’t let what is so special about you be robbed because you’re not seeing what is special. Self-esteem again. Know you are capable and beautiful and have a growth mindset.

Find the ROOTS on a TREE as your Friends

You want friends that aren’t there for a season. You want friends in your life that are invested. Surround yourself with people who are there to plant seeds rather than pick the fruit. Let them go if they’re not in your life for the right reasons.

Remember: YOU MATTER . . . IT DOESN’T.

There is a WHY to why we are broken, rejected, abandoned, or hurt. Don’t choose to carry this pain with you through life. Develop a growth mindset. Figure out the WHY and ask the HOW questions.

Remember, forgiveness is for you. It’s not for them.

Choose love. Choose you. Choose Growth.

Check out Bobby Petrocelli at www.10Seconds.org. As always, I am at www.JeffYalden.com.

Filed Under: High Schools, Inspiring Conversations, Life, Mental Health, Motivation, Personal Development, Purpose, Success Tagged With: 10 Seconds, Bobby Petrocelli, Control, High School Motivational Mental Health Speaker, High School Motivational Speaker, High School Speaker, Inspiration, Inspirational, Inspiring Conversations, Jeff Yalden, Mental Health, Mental Health Speaker, Motivation, Motivational, Motivational Speaker, School, Schools, Teen Motivational Speaker, Teens, Yalden, Youth, Youth Motivational Speaker, Youth Speaker

Teen Suicide Behaviors and Responding in a Crisis

January 23, 2020 by Jeff Yalden

“Teen Suicide Behaviors and Responding in a Crisis” is written by Jeff Yalden and provided for school communities to help save lives and teach mental health in our schools. Teen Suicide is an epidemic today concerning school communities. Know suicidal behavior and warning signs of suicidal ideation and how to respond in the event of a crisis. Jeff Yalden is a teen suicide prevention expert and works with school communities helping to create policies and procedures for school staff. Jeff speaks with students, teachers, counselors, administration, parents, and communities on teen mental health and building school culture to create a winning environment that helps students succeed and improve the morale and retainership of school staff.
“Jeff is an amazing speaker and his message is powerful. I heard him for the first time in Atchison,KS after our community suffered from some very tragic losses. Jeff was amazing and helped with the healing process. My high school son heard Jeff speak and his comment to me was “that was powerful mom.” I brought Jeff to my district this past fall. Again, his message was powerful and he touched the lives of many. Jeff you are amazing!!!  Keep fighting the fight!” – Julie Crum, Principal

Addressing Teen Suicide & Prevention in Schools

Teen Suicide Prevention Course for School Communities

Addressing teen suicide in schools is becoming more of a concern everyday. Our school administrators are understanding that they need to bring this more attention, but the concern is how to do it in a safe and non-triggering manner that is educational, informative, and provides help for those in need. Without the proper community resources, understand the schools are lacking the correct resources to address students in need of third party professional care. Nonetheless, at the onset, it’s about relationships and getting our youth to talk. It’s important that our students learn about mental health from the same trusted adults they learn everyday from. Full applause to every administrator, teacher, coach, student, and parent that supports this and is willing to address the topic of teen mental health. Bravo! We have a lot of work to do, but let’s not shy away from the topic of Teen Mental Health.

When the Conversation Happens

Let’s get acquainted with a few things regarding the conversation about teen mental health, teen suicide, suicidal behavior or mental wellness. First, the conversation don’t need to be in crisis moments. The conversations don’t need to be depressing either.  It’s really important that we all get educated and know what to do when the conversation happens in real time. Even before the conversation starts, we need to notice the red flags and potential suicidal behavior that will lead us to have the conversation. Listen, nothing to be worried about. Nothing to want to shy away from. We are adults and we have experience and wisdom. Talk to your teens, students, youth in the same manner you talk about your subject or a current event. You are the trusted and significant adult. They’re going to listen to you. With everything, approach this conversation with compassion, empathy, and be really present with your heart to theirs. This moment is a moment that can shape their life forever and you are that light the individual needs. Give yourself permission to know you can and will say the right thing. Know that you listening and being present is what matters most in this moment.

You Might Not Be Qualified

Stop right there. You might not be trained in mental health as a counselor or therapist, but you are trusted as a teacher or you’ve been given the honor of being a mom or dad, coach, aunt, uncle, youth pastor, or some other significant adult. You are qualified in these moments of crisis where a young person trusts in you. What you do in these moments matter most. Your number one job is to cherish this relationship right here and right now. Listen. Care. Be the source that bridges this individual with the person they need to be with to get the help they need. Think parents. Think school counselor. Think professional mental health care. Put this in order. First, get in touch with your school counselor or school administration. You’ve done your job. They will contact parents and let’s hope the parents do the right thing. In the meantime, you’ve done more than what a qualified person can do. A qualified person wasn’t there when the individual needed that trusting and significant adult. Believe in you. However, do remember you are not the therapist and your job isn’t to fix the individual. You being present, compassionate, and giving your attention to the situation is saving the person’s life and giving them hope, permission, and the right advise of what is next.

Warning Signs of Teen Suicide

The warning signs associated with teen suicide should be learned by every adult and student. This should be common place in today’s schools. Just knowing the warning signs alone can make the conversation happen before the individual reaches out. You will know when to intervene. Active listening skills should be a staff development workshop as well as a class for students. This way, anyone hearing or seeing warning signs can intervene when they witness those signs that are a “Cry for help.”

Jeff’s new booklet for Parents and Teens

The more education we receive on teen suicide behaviors and how to respond the greater chances we have of saving lives and getting people the help they need.

Outside Resources

All teachers and school personnel should be given the outside resources that are available within your community. Make it available to all teachers in a booklet and also add it to your school website resources page. Having this information on hand and readily accessible shows genuine concern for your students and also offers a sense of hope in facing life’s challenges.

School Policy on Teen Suicide

Every school should have their policy on teen suicide available along with the resources. This policy should cover the basics of what to look for such as the warning signs, symptoms, myths and facts, clues, and more. This should be written with the help of school counselors, mental health professionals, and should be talked about with all staff present so they’re comfortable in the policies and procedures if and when they find themselves in a conversation or a crisis. Know the policies and procedures and have them written down and provided to all staff. Knowing what to do and how to respond appropriately to suicidal behavior and a crisis or a threat in school or out of school is important to saving a life before an individual reacts emotionally. This knowledge will not only help students and staff members, but it will also possibly avoid lawsuits.

Renowned youth mental health and suicide prevention speaker has a theory about teen suicide

Teen Suicide Behaviors: Clues

All teachers and staff members should be aware of clues that will show the warning signs. Take all signs seriously. If you see something you should say something. If you know something you should do something. You generally have four different types clues that something is wrong:
  • Direct Verbal Clues
  • Indirect Verbal Clues
  • Behavioral Clues
  • Situational Clues
Within these types of clues there are warning signs of suicidal behavior to look for and know about. They include but are not limited to:
  • Talking about suicide, hurting themselves, death, or dying
  • Seeking access to firearms or pills
  • Withdrawing from friends, family, and society
  • Having severe mood swings
  • Feeling hopeless or trapped
  • Increased use of alcohol or drugs
  • Sleeping all the time or having issues with sleep
  • Uncontrolled rage or agitation
  • Self-destructive and risky behavior
  • Giving away personal belongings
  • Telling people goodbye for seemingly no reason
For more information about teen suicide, please visit Jeff’s Teen Suicide section on his website.

Don’t let this happen to one of your students.

Remember people at any age can experience suicidal thoughts. Suicide is the second leading cause of death among teenagers.

Other Factors to Consider

  • Gender: Men commit suicide successfully 4.5 times more often than women, but women attempt suicide 2-4 times more than men.
  • Ethnicity: African-Americans, Hispanic-Americans, and Asian-Americans have lower rates than Euro-Americans.
    • However, Native Americans have rates 1.6-4.2 times the national average.
  • Sexual orientation: Homosexual teens are three times more likely to attempts suicide than heterosexual teens.
  • Previous suicide attempts: Of all completed suicides, 10-40% have previously attempted suicide.

Ways to Intervene

Knowing the policies and procedures will help immensely.  Follow the guidelines accordingly and be confident to step into action. Be prepared to drop everything to take time to deal with the situation. Take every complaint and feeling the individual expresses seriously. Do not try to minimize the problem by telling the person everything they have to live for. This will only increase feelings of guilt and hopelessness and could result in suicidal behavior. Be calm, supportive, and nonjudgmental. Listen actively and encourage self-disclosure. It is okay to acknowledge the reality of suicide as a choice, but do not “normalize” suicide as a choice. Assure the individual they’re doing the right thing by confiding in you. Do not express discomfort with the situation. Your willingness to discuss it will show the person you care and you want to help.  Stay with the person. Never leave him/her alone until further action has been taken. You have done everything you can by just being in the moment, listening and being non-judgemental.

Suicidal Ideation on Phone

If you are talking to someone via phone, do not hang up; get someone else to call for help on another line. Be on speaker and be texting someone immediately. Don’t overreact until you know the severity, but take all signs seriously. Get someone to the person in distress immediately. Recognize that talking about suicide will not plant the idea! In reality, talking about suicide reduces their anxiety.

Show You Care and Want To Help

Listen and ask questions. Show that you are paying attention and that you care. Ask direct, straightforward questions. (“Are you thinking of suicide?”) Be aware that students will usually respond “no.” This is not your place to challenge them or wonder if they’re being truthful. Remember, you are the person that got them talking and the next step will be with the mental health professionals or third party psychiatric care and evaluation. Without you intervening here they may not get the help they need.

Ask Questions to Assess the Severity of the Situation

  • What has happened to make life so difficult?
  • What has been keeping you alive so far?
  • Are you thinking of suicide?
  • Do you have a suicide plan?
  • Do you use alcohol or drugs?
  • When you think about yourself and the future, what do you visualize?
  • Is the means available to you? Remove the means if possible.
  • What do you think the odds are that you will kill yourself?
Don’t ask the questions back to back. Ask and listen. Let them talk. The more you listen the more the individual will know you care.

The SLAP Method

Determining the severity of the risk isn’t your call to make. The situation needs to be addressed with the parents, the school counselors, or a third party mental health professional from your conversation. That includes you calling 911, school administration, school counselor, parents, family members, etc. It’s important that you have this information though because it needs to be documented and shared when you make the call. S = How (S) pecific are the details of the plan? L = What is the (L) evel of lethality of the plan? (Gun vs. aspirin) A = What is the (A) vailability of the proposed method? P = What is the (P) roximity to helping resources? Be positive and supportive in your approach. Help the individual student see that what they’re feeling in this moment is temporary and that the crisis will pass. Just get the individual to breathe. Let the individual know they’re okay and they will be okay. Validate them for sharing and coming forward. Share about that situations we deal with are temporary, but suicide is forever. It’s okay to say this in the conversation.  Just remember, you are not a trained therapist and you can’t fix their heart. Just care and be there. In the here and the now, your job is to understand, be compassionate, empathetic, and lead the individual to the right person in the moment of crisis. I can’t repeat that enough.

Support Groups and People to Help

Often an individual contemplating suicide is unaware of the different support groups such as (e.g., counselors, family, friends) that are available. Or, they feel they can’t talk to them or they don’t know how to talk to them. Mention the individual’s family as a source of strength, but if they reject the idea, back away quickly. For teens, the source of pain is usually either the family or the peer group. When you know which it is, you are in a better position to help or refer for help. Use constructive questions to help separate and define the person’s problems and remove some of their confusion. To help the person understand their situation, use active listening and respond empathically. (“It sounds like you feel…”). Allow them to talk and you listen.

Being Prepared in Moments of Crisis

If it’s a crisis situation and you need to make crisis management decisions in the moment. Be decisive. Rapid decision making on the part of the intervener is extremely important. If you need someone to help find out who the individual’s trusted and significant adult is and call for help. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Example: “So, I know you’re really close with your math teacher, Ms. __________. Would you like me to call and see if she is available?”

Moving Forward in the Moment of Crisis

Report the incident or any potential teen suicide behavior to the appropriate school personnel. Again, this is school counselor(s) or school administration. Here again, know the the proper protocol. Know policy and procedure so you move forward according to your school districts guidelines.

Never Leave a Suicidal Person Alone

Before leaving the individual make sure they verbally promise they will be safe and won’t make a forever decision – Commit Suicide. If you can, get the student to sign something that you had written up. Make sure this is the last resort before leaving a student alone in this situation. Teen Suicide and acting on impulse is like what butter is to bread. Know that their behavior and the crisis situation they’re feeling time is of the utmost importance. Do not leave the person alone . . . UNLESS, and this is a big UNLESS, you absolutely have no other choice and you’ve agreed with the person in writing they’ll be okay for the night. If you can’t get hold of school personnel such as counselor or school administration, call the students parents or guardians. Please make a decisive decision for what is in the best interest of the student and their well-being. Save a life first. Depending on the time of day and the whereabouts of this moment, you have to act and do accordingly. Do not keep the person’s threat a secret, but do respect their privacy. Be confident and think through the situation in what is the best, safest, outcome for the individual.

Actions to Avoid

Responding in Crisis Situations isn’t easy, but know that in the moment you need to breathe and relax. It’s going to be okay, but here are some things to avoid. Make no promises. This is a situation where it is never appropriate to promise confidentiality. Do not ignore or lessen the suicidal threat. Avoid sounding shocked at the suicidal thoughts. Do not stress the shock or pain that the suicide may cause their family before you are certain that is not exactly what the student hopes to accomplish. Don’t moralize. Do not argue with a student who may be suicidal. You may not only lose the debate, but also the person. Don’t criticize, ridicule, or infer that the person is crazy. Don’t be concerned by long periods of silence. Allow the student time to think. Do not ignore your own intuitions about a student’s suicidal behavior or changes. Do not try to handle the situation alone. Do not attempt in-depth counseling. Be present. Be patient. Listen.

Teen Suicide: Additional Information

If a suicide does occur, it is essential that the students be provided with accurate facts about the suicide as soon as possible. This information should be given to all students simultaneously. It is necessary to provide sufficient time for discussion and also support for the students. Be careful here, because you need to know what the family/parents are saying. This is also a moment where the school administration may not have had time to brief the school staff. If this is the case, the teachers are already in class and will have to address the situation with their classes.  Another reason why it’s important to address teen suicide: behaviors and responding in moments of crisis. Staff members want to know what to say and how to support their students. Give them permission that they’re capable of having this conversation and that it’s okay to speak from their heart. Be gentle, listen, it’s okay to show your emotions. This is real and the kids want real. They want their teachers to be real and not to sugarcoat situation or events. The students will look to you for guidance and support. It’s okay to just say, “I don’t know right now. I’m shocked. I have to process this and breathe. Right now, that’s all we can all do.” It’s okay to say, “I’m sorry. This really sucks!” Allow them to talk and express their feelings. Getting them to talk openly and together is the best and safest thing as they’re all together. Keep the students in school. School is the safest place for everyone to be. Together.

Teen Suicide Statistics

  • Of the people that commit the act of suicide, 90% have showed signs that indicated they needed help. Most have told someone within the previous couple weeks that they were thinking about hurting themselves.
  • In the past 30 years, teen suicide has increased 300%.
  • Among children between the ages of 10-14, suicide has gone up 112%.
  • For every completed suicide, there are between 300 attempts.
  • Suicidal adolescents are a diverse group. Be aware of the ripple effect.
  • Research shows an increase in adolescent suicide following media coverage of a high profile suicide.
For more information about Jeff Yalden and his work in school communities, please visit www.JeffYalden.com.

Jeff Yalden: Teen Mental Health and High School Assemblies

  • Guide for Parents
  • Teen Suicide Prevention Course
  • Superintendent Reference Letter
  • Teen Suicide Book
  • Reference Letters 2020
  • Best of Jeff Yalden Videos

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, For Parents, High Schools, Loss, Mental Health, Teachers and Staff, Teen Depression / Suicide Tagged With: Addressing Teen Suicide in High School, Behaviors of Suicide Ideation, Books on Teen Suicide, How to deal with a teen suicide, How to respond to Teen Suicidal Ideation, How to teach Teen Mental Health, Jeff Yalden, Jeff Yalden Controversy, Mental Health in Schools, Self-Harm Teens, Speakers on Mental Health, Suicidal Ideation in Schools, Suicide Prevention in Schools, Teen Speaker, Teen Suicide, Youth Motivational Speaker Teen Mental Health, Youth Speaker

Positivity at Riverton Parke Jr. Sr. High School

February 2, 2017 by Jeff Yalden, Youth Motivational Speaker

High School Motivational Speaker video goes viral: 11000 Views in 30 Hours

It was still dark at 7:45 in the morning on January 26, 2017, when Jeff Yalden was on his way to speak at Riverton Parke Junior-Senior High School in Montezuma, Indiana – just north of Terre Haute. Yalden said he woke up slightly depressed because of the weather, and he started thinking about seasonal affective disorder – or SAD – and how this might impact the kids. The Mayo Clinic defines SAD as a type of depression that’s related to changes in seasons that begins and ends at about the same times every year. “Indiana is ranked number two in the nation for teen-completed suicides – and for those of you that suffer from mental illness, you understand the effects of seasonal affective disorder,” Yalden said. By eight o’clock, the morning light was just starting to come through, and Jeff made his way into the school. The morning to this point could be called dreary. What happened next can be likened to being lit up by two rays of positivity. “I walked into the school and I met two incredible high school students – Taylor and Lexi – who just opened my heart and made me feel like I really wanted to be there. They gave me a tour of the school and before I knew it, everything changed.” Jeff said that seeing two kids representing their school so well was the most incredible thing he had ever seen. He went on to speak for nearly two hours, covering topics like self-esteem, purpose, self-respect and the importance of the right attitude on a daily basis. Many people have dreams, but they remain just that without action. “Dreams don’t work. Plans do,” he said. “As a coach, I would probably dream of winning – but it starts with a plan.” As always, Jeff was in the moment. He knows what he is talking about because he has been there. His authenticity was not lost on the student body. He stressed the importance of putting plans into writing – and reminded these young people that nothing will ever replace human relationships. At the end of his talk, he was given a standing ovation. Jeff’s video of this school visit went viral, receiving 11,000 views in the first 30 hours since it posted. Taylor and Lexi gave Yalden the sunshine he needed on a grey, chilly morning. “The kids were amazing, and for someone that deals with mental health, I have got to prepare myself every day. I was ill-prepared on this day – but those two young ladies were awesome,” he said. “It was an amazing visit and one that I will always remember.” Jeff has presented more than 4,500 programs in all 50 States, 48 countries and every Canadian province – and counting. Is your school or organization ready for The Jeff Yalden Experience? Find out more at www.jeffyalden.com or call 800-948-9289 to book Jeff now.

Filed Under: High Schools, Teen Depression / Suicide Tagged With: Depression, Education Speaker, High School Motivational Assemblies, High School Motivational Speaker, Indiana, Jeff Yalden, Mayo Clinic, Motivational Speaker for Schools, Motivational Speaker for Teens, Riverton Junior-Senior High School, School Speaker, Seasonal Affective Disorder, Suicide Prevention, Teen Mental Health Speaker, Teen Speaker, Teen Suicide, Terre Haute, Youth Motivational Speaker, Youth Speaker

A Change Is in Order

August 7, 2015 by Jeff Yalden, Youth Motivational Speaker

A Change Is in Order Nothing changes until you change. While the difficult takes time, the seemingly impossible just takes a little longer. Today marks one year since the day that my dad knocked on my door about midnight in early August and told me to get up. He and my mom were worried about me. He called 911, and I was rushed off to the emergency room. I spent the next couple days pondering my life when the endocrinologist looked at me and said that I had been moments from something catastrophic happening. He didn’t say days; the doctor said I had only been moments from losing my life. I have diabetes type 2. My weight was 344 pounds. My blood pressure was high. My A1C blood test was 14.9 where a normal range is 4.5 to 6 percent. I was in really bad shape. A high triglycerides level is 200 to 499 mg/dL, but my triglycerides were beyond high at 2,784. A year later, I look back on that day and ask myself what has changed, and the answer is simple—nothing has changed. And I’ve thought about it day and night. I think about being self-disciplined, I think about routine, I think about structure, and if I’m going to be honest with myself, I think about all I’ve made is one excuse after another. I said, “Tomorrow I’ll change. I’ll do it tomorrow.” And then I said, “How about on Monday? Monday I’ll start.” But when you talk about a specific starting date or you talk about starting tomorrow, that only says one thing—it says that you’re not really committed to making the change. My weight is down to 337 pounds, and because of medications, all of my blood sugars and my blood work are okay; my health is in check, I’m feeling good. Actually, I’m feeling great! But that is nothing more than a Band-Aid on the real problem. As I talked today with my personal trainer and another emergency room doctor at the Crossfit Center, we decided to get real with each other. Well, they’ve actually been real with me for a while; I just haven’t been real with myself. They’ve designed thirty-one workouts of the day. I’ve completed only ten of them. I need to be honest with them and with myself. I do travel. I am on the road a lot, but they have also devised workouts in that plan that I can do while I’m traveling. So the bottom line is this: In one year, I haven’t changed, but I’ve continued to make a lot of excuses. I am going to commit to three simple things right now.
  1. I’m going to wake up each day with a commitment: a commitment to myself and a commitment to my health.
 
  1. I am going to keep a written account. Every single day, I am going to write down where I am and where I’m going, what I did for a workout, and what my diet consisted of.
 
  1. I am going to set a goal that is specific, attainable, and measureable.
If followed through on every single day, those three things should really only take six to eight weeks to develop into a new purpose and a new habit. Just remember—nothing changes until you choose to change!

Filed Under: Motivational Minutes, Teen Depression / Suicide Tagged With: Blood Sugar, Crossfit, Depression, Diabetes, Healthy Life Style, Jeff Yalden, Mental Health, Motivation, teen depression, Teen Motivation, Teen Motivational Speaker, Teen Suicide, Weight Loss, Youth Speaker

Wanting for our Children – To Become The Best or To Want The Best

May 15, 2015 by Jeff Yalden, Youth Motivational Speaker

Jeff Yalden - Speaker for Teens

Jeff Yalden – Mental Health Speaker for Teens & Parents.

I HAD heard about all of the dying, about all of the grief, and still I didn’t immediately understand what I was seeing when, at a railroad crossing here, I spotted a man in a blaring orange vest, the kind that road crews and public-safety workers wear. He wasn’t carrying any equipment. He wasn’t engaged in any obvious activity. He shuffled his feet, staring into the distance. Hours later, at the same crossing: an orange-vested woman. Like the man, she just stood there, without evident purpose. “They’re on the lookout,” a friend of mine who lives here explained. “For what?” I asked. “Suicides,” my friend said. Between May 2009 and January 2010, five Palo Alto teenagers ended their lives by stepping in front of trains. And since October of last year, another three Palo Alto teenagers have killed themselves that way, prompting longer hours by more sentries along the tracks. The Palo Alto Weekly refers to the deaths as a “suicide contagion.” And while mental health professionals are rightly careful not to oversimplify or trivialize the psychic distress behind them by focusing on any one possible factor, the contagion has prompted an emotional debate about the kinds of pressures felt by high school students in epicenters of overachievement. This is one such place. Children here grow up in the shadow of Stanford University, which established a new precedent for exclusivity during the recent admissions season, accepting just 5 percent of its applicants. They grow up with parents who have scaled the pinnacles of their professions or are determined to have their offspring do precisely that. They grow up with advanced-placement classes galore, convinced that their futures hinge on perfect SAT scores and preternatural grade-point averages. Experts on sleep are in keen demand. The kids here don’t get enough of it.
If you know of a teen that is suicidal, please have them visit www.NotTheSolution.com and encourage them to seek help immediately!
But the situation isn’t so different in the Virginia suburbs of Washington, D.C., where a separate cluster of teen suicides in recent years forced educators and parents to re-examine the messages they give teenagers, intentionally and unintentionally, about what’s expected of them and what’s needed to get ahead in this world. It’s not so different in Chicago’s western suburbs, where a high school teacher recently pulled me aside and, in a pained whisper, insisted that the number of advanced-placement classes that local students feel compelled to take and the number of hospitalizations for depression rise in tandem.
An-Unforgettable-Night

Order your video today . . . Jeff spent 48 hours in a community suffering from loss and searching for meaning and answers to their questions. Visit https://jeffyalden.com/products/.

These are to some extent problems of affluence and privilege. But they have relevance beyond any one subset of our country’s populace. They reflect a status consciousness that bedevils Americans at all income levels, and they underscore an economic trepidation that is sadly widespread and is seemingly intensified by the gaping divide between the haves and have-nots. The suicide rate among all teenagers has seemingly risen a bit over the last decade. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, it was 8.15 per every 100,000 Americans between the ages of 10 and 24 in 2013, the last year for which complete data is available; the rate was 6.74 in 2003. Many more children think about taking their own lives. According to a 2013 survey by the C.D.C., 17 percent of American high school students had considered suicide in the previous year. Eight percent said they’d attempted it. And suicide clusters have at least as much to do with imitation as with environment, each instance of self-annihilation planting an idea and heightening the possibility of the next. There’s no direct line connecting the pressures of Palo Alto and the deaths. But the community’s soul searching goes beyond those tragedies, to matters plenty important in and of themselves. Are kids here getting to be kids? Does a brand of hovering, exactingly prescriptive parenting put them in unforgiving boxes and prevent them from finding their true selves and true grit? “There’s something about childhood itself in Palo Alto and in communities like Palo Alto that undermines the mental health and wellness of our children,” Julie Lythcott-Haims told me. Lythcott-Haims was a dean at Stanford from 2002 to 2012. She lives in Palo Alto. Her two children, ages 13 and 15, go to school here. And she’s the author of a new book, to be published in June, called “How to Raise an Adult.” It reflects on the shortfalls of some modern parenting, which, in her view, can be not only overprotective but overbearing, micromanaging the lives of children, pointing them toward specific mile markers of achievement and denying them any time to flail or room to fail. They wind up simultaneously frazzled and fragile.
If you know of a teen that is suicidal, please have them visit www.NotTheSolution.com and encourage them to seek help immediately!
“The suicides are tragic, but they are at the pointy head of the pyramid, the tippy top,” she said. “Beneath them is a larger number of kids who are really struggling and beneath them is an even larger number of kids who feel an amount of stress and pressure that they shouldn’t be made to and that’s untenable.” THE local media has been rife with commentary, from many perspectives, about the mental health of Palo Alto teenagers. Here is what Carolyn Walworth, a junior at Palo Alto High School, recently wrote: “As I sit in my room staring at the list of colleges I’ve resolved to try to get into, trying to determine my odds of getting into each, I can’t help but feel desolate.” She confessed to panic attacks in class, to menstrual periods missed as a result of exhaustion. “We are not teenagers,” she added. “We are lifeless bodies in a system that breeds competition, hatred, and discourages teamwork and genuine learning.” Adam Strassberg, a psychiatrist and the father of two Palo Alto teenagers, wrote that while many Palo Alto parents are “wealthy and secure beyond imagining,” they’re consumed by fear of losing that perch or failing to bequeath it to their kids. “Maintaining and advancing insidiously high educational standards in our children is a way to soothe this anxiety,” he said. He made these observations apart from the suicides, for which, he emphasized, “There is no single cause.” He recommended lightening children’s schedules, limiting the number of times that they take the SAT, lessening the message that it’s Stanford or bust. “I will never be neutral on this issue,” he wrote. “The ‘Koala Dad’ is the far better parent than the ‘Tiger Mom.’ ” What he was saying — and what’s obvious, but warrants repeating — is that ushering children toward a bright future means getting them there in one piece. There’s a fresh awareness of that here, and perhaps a new receptiveness to some words of his that should echo far beyond Palo Alto: “Want the best for your child, not for your child to be the best.”

Filed Under: For Parents, Teen Depression / Suicide Tagged With: Counseling Mental Health, Counselor, Depression, Education, Jeff Yalden, Mental Health, Mental Health Awareness, Mental Health Speaker, Motivational, Self-Harm, Suicide, Suicide Prevention, Suicide Prevention Specialist, teen depression, Teen Mental Health, Teen Speaker, Teen Suicide, Youth Speaker

Mental Health of Teenagers: Danger Signs

April 12, 2015 by Jeff Yalden, Youth Motivational Speaker

Celebrity Teen & Family Life Coach

Adolescence is not easy. It affects not only the teenager but also parents. The former undergoes many changes, including sexual, physical, hormonal, emotional, intellectual, and social – the combined pressures of all these changes can often become overwhelming for them and may lead to a number of mental health issues. Mental health problems are a major concern as some can be life threatening. Here are a few guidelines for parents and caretakers to positively identify any mental health issues that their children may be suffering from.

Mental Health Problems Are Treatable

First of all, it is imperative to understand that mental health conditions can be treated. You can speak to a pediatrician, the local health department, the school’s representatives, and health care professionals regarding the treatment options available to you.

Keeping an Eye Open: Danger Signs to Look Out For

Excessive sleeping that is beyond the typical teenage fatigue. This could indicate substance abuse or depression.
  • Loss of self-esteem
  • Unexpected decline in their academic performance
  • Loss of appetite and weight loss
  • Significant personality shifts, such as excessive anger and aggressiveness

Key Mental Health Issues

Some of the key mental health issues that teens need to be monitored for are:
  1. Depression
  2. Eating disorders
  3. Drug abuse
Depression While every human being experiences the ‘blues’, depression is something far more serious and requires immediate attention. Some of the symptoms to watch out for are:
  • Changes in the sleeping patterns
  • Excessive moodiness and/or unexpected weeping
  • Eating habits that cause weight gain/loss
  • Excessive secrecy or paranoia
  • Self-mutilation
  • Excessive isolation
  • Abandonment of social groups and friends
  • Obsessive concerns for body image
Eating disorders Depression can often cause eating disorders. The following conditions may be a result of such disorders:
  • Anorexia – averting food and significant changes in their eating habits.
  • Bulimia – forced vomiting after eating food. You need to be on the lookout for significant weight loss without any changes in their eating habits.
Drug Abuse Peer pressure combined with mental issues can be very forceful in leading adolescents in trying out different drugs, including alcohol. In addition to knowing the physical and behavioral signs of drug abuse, parents and caretakers should also: Stay alert for abuse of prescription drugs: According to AAP, abuse of prescription drugs stands second after alcohol and marijuana abuse. Vicodin and Xanax are the most commonly abused drugs. Understand that over-the-counter (OTC) drugs can also be abused. Teenagers often misuse cough and cold medications that contain sedatives.   If you have any concerns regarding the health of your child – both mental and physical – you should first address your child. Opening the channels of communication is a great way that can pave way for a better understanding between you and them. If this does not work, then it is strongly recommended that professional health care staff be involved along with school management in order to control the situation before it gets any worse. For more information about Mental Health and Teens, contact your school about inviting Jeff Yalden, Youth Motivational Speaker and Celebrity Teen & Family Life Coach to your community to speak to the middle school and high school students and to speak to the parents about teens today and the emotions plaguing our youth.  Visit www.JeffYalden.com for more informative information.  Suicide Prevention in our teens?  Text HELPMYFRIEND to 33444 and together we can save lives.  Visit www.NotTheSolution.com.

Filed Under: For Parents, Teen Depression / Suicide Tagged With: Danger Signs, Depression, Education, Jeff Yalden, Life Coach for Teens, Parenting, Parents, Suicide Prevention, Teen Life Coach, Teen Suciide, Teenagers, Teens, Training, Youth, Youth Motivational Speaker, Youth Speaker

Texting Acronyms for Parents of Teens

January 2, 2015 by Jeff Yalden, Youth Motivational Speaker

Parents – Don’t be fooled by the following acronyms your teens are using as they text their friends.  Here is a short list of the ever changing world of technology. 
For Teens and Internet, please follow: Kim Komando.
Warning: Can be shocking to some! Your kid has something to hide CD9: Short for “Code 9,” which means parents are around. KPC: Keeping Parents Clueless MOS: Mom Over Shoulder P911: Parent Alert PAL: Parents Are Listening PAW: Parents Are Watching PIR: Parent In Room POS: Parent Over Shoulder Your kid’s personal information or safety is at risk ASL: Age/Sex/Location F2F: Face to Face. Asking for a meeting or video chat LMIRL: Let’s Meet In Real Life NAZ: Name/Address/ZIP MOOS: Member of the Opposite Sex MOSS: Member of the Same Sex MORF or RUMORF: Male or Female, or Are Your Male or Female? RU/18: Are You Over 18? WUF: Where You From? WYCM: Will You Call Me? WYRN: What’s Your Real Name? Your kid shouldn’t be involved in this 143, 459 or ILU: I love you 1174: Invited to a wild party 420: Marijuana GNOC: Get Naked On Cam GYPO: Get Your Pants Off AMEZRU: I Am Easy, Are You? IWSN: I Want Sex Now KFY or K4Y: Kiss For You KOTL: Kiss On The Lips NIFOC: Nude In Front Of The Computer RUH: Are You Horny? TDTM: Talk Dirty To Me Not every acronym is bad BRB: Be Right Back CWYL: Chat With You Later CYT: See You Tomorrow IMHO: In My Humble Opinion IMNSHO: In My Not So Humble Opinion L8R: Later LMK: Let Me Know NM: Never Mind ROTFL: Rolling On The Floor Laughing SOHF: Sense Of Humor Failure If you’re curious about another acronym that you’ve stumbled across in your kids’ texts or chat, look it up on NetLingo. It has a continually updating list of online acronyms, along with their various meanings and origins. As any parent will tell you, dealing with teenagers and preteens is a fine balancing act. You want to give them freedom to explore, but you also need to keep tabs on what they’re doing. Click here for 5 dangerous apps you don’t know your kid is using. I recommend friending or following your kids on any sites they use. If they know you’re watching, they’re less likely to do something they shouldn’t. Plus, you can keep an eye to make sure they aren’t revealing information they shouldn’t or talking to people who aren’t safe. Of course, you never know what sites they might be using that you don’t know about. That’s where monitoring and tracking apps and software come in handy. You can keep tabs on everything they do online. Just be sure to communicate with your kids about why certain sites are bad so they can grow into responsible digital citizens. In fact, you should start before they’re teens with my 10 Commandments for Kids Online. It’s a contract between you and your child about the do’s and don’ts of our digital life. Jeff Yalden is a youth motivational speaker and celebrity teen and family life coach.  Visit Jeff at www.JeffYalden.com.

Filed Under: For Parents Tagged With: Bullying, Cell Phones, Counselors, Depression, Digital Age, Education, High School, Jeff, Mental Health, Motivational, Parenting, Parents, Sexting, Technology for Teens, Teens, Texting, Yalden, Youth Speaker

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