The more we get to know ourselves through counseling, wisdom, experience and daily self-care, the more comfortable we are with who we are, what life means and how we live.
Enjoy my seven Rules of Life and it is my hope that you find peace, love and joy in your mental and physical well-being, just as I continue to do every day:
1. Let It Go
You are only one person. You can only do so much. If you can change a situation for the better, do so. If you can’t, let it go. Show up every day and do the best you can.
2. Ignore Gracefully
Don’t participate in drama or outside noise. Don’t listen to other people who put you down or don’t believe in you or your dreams. Ignore those who fail to validate you or are just plain rude. Live a life that is empowering to you. Be graceful in how you respond, act, speak and do. Remember, it’s their issue. Not yours. And if people walk out on you, LET THEM GO!
3. Give It Time
We’re connected 24/7, 365 days a year. Time is at a premium and there never seems to be enough of it. Choose to bring back time by being mindful and present. Choose to bring back time by being mindful and present. Although life is about being in the moment, we must also have patience in the process of living. Perfection doesn’t exist. You matter. Perfection doesn’t matter.
4. Don’t Compare
We live in a world where everyone is trying to live a life compared to what they see on social media, and it can become an addiction. What you are accustomed to is embellished, filtered and photoshopped, depicting an image of a lifestyle that isn’t real. People are making it look like their lives are perfect and yours doesn’t measure up. Don’t get caught up in other people’s fake lives. Put the phone down and connect with people your heart to theirs.
5. Breathe & Stay Calm
It will be OK. Just breathe. Stay calm and don’t act on emotions. You don’t need to answer that email or text right now. Take time for yourself. Have balance and boundaries. Have a trusted friend that you can talk to and vent and know they’re supportive and nonjudgmental. Don’t ever be afraid to seek a counselor or therapist to learn tools for coping, communicating or problem solving. Remember, they work for you. Just breathe. It will be OK.
6. You Are Responsible
The most powerful two-letter-ten -words in the English language: “If it’s going to be, then it’s up to me.”
Tough times happen. It might be your fault, or it might not – but understand this: How you move forward from anything is always your responsibility. What are you going to do? Don’t be a victim. Choose to be a victor. Don’t be bitter or angry. It does no good. Choose to be better every day. Be responsible in your behavior, your attitude and the choices you make.
Love will always be stronger than hate. A smile will always be better than a frown. You’ll feel the smile yourself and your smile will brighten someone else’s day. It takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. If you can’t find a reason to smile, try this: Choose three things you are grateful for and reflect on being appreciative. Replace expectations with appreciation and gratitude.
Life Isn’t Easy
Life isn’t all rollercoasters, unicorns and rainbows. Expectations leave us disappointed. We live in an imperfect world. Things aren’t always fair nor are they black and white. Don’t get caught up in the complications of life. You can only do or be in control of so much. This can be overwhelming when you see it all in front of you. Relax. Breathe. Simplify.
At the end of the day, you can’t change people, places or things. You can control you and how you live, act, and respond to people, places, and things. Live with grace, forgiveness, and acceptance. Learn self-care and advocate for your own best mental, physical and spiritual health. Be influential. Be the light for others.
As Gandhi said, “Be the change.” Live in a way you wish others can live their lives.
Thanks for letting me share my 7 Rules for Life.
Teen Mental Health Motivational & Educational Consultant: Jeff Yalden
Jeff Yalden is highly regarded as the number one Teen Mental Health Speaker in all of North America. Jeff is a Suicide Crisis Intervention Expert and Suicide Prevention Trainer working with hundreds of school communities every year.
He’s an Amazon Best Selling Author of four books, including Teen Suicide: The WHY Behind Today’s Suicide Epidemic and BOOM: One Word to Instantly Inspire Action, Deliver Rewards, and Positively Affect Your Life Every Day! His podcast, Mental Health & Motivation: The Unlikely Life Coach continues to attract thousands of new subscribers every month for his direct talk and influence on families and teens.
Since 1992, Jeff Yalden has traveled to 50 states and 48 countries delivering his message, “About Life.”
From 2005-2011, Jeff was a celebrity teen and family life coach on MTV’s hit realty show MADE.
As a celebrity teen & family life coach, Jeff gets the heart of the matter helping teens, young adults, families, and communities in their struggles together.
He’s a Gulf War Veteran and a two- time Marine-of-the-year recipient 1991-1992. He was Mr. New Hampshire Male America, 1990.
Every year over 1 million people are left inspired by Jeff Yalden’s inexhaustible energy that permeates after he speaks.
Jeff has an online suicide prevention course for school communities, parents, teachers, staff, and teens. Check it out HERE.
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